Day 32

Another great day in the neighborhood! I haven't talked about it much in this blog, but I am a cancer survivor. I am a very blessed cancer survivor. My stage 3 Clear Cell Renal Cell Carcinoma was discovered (I had no symptoms) on my left kidney while my physician was checking up on something else.  It really was a miracle. I had a complete nephrectomy in January 2011 and am doing just fine. I have the best doctors in the world who take really good care of me and family/friends who are so very supportive. One thing that has to be done regularly is a check-up, for my doctors to make sure that there is no recurrence of the cancer (this will go on for 10 years before I'm called 'cancer-free'). It seems that Clear Cell Renal Cell Carcinoma is a nasty cancer that likes to take up residence in other parts of a body it has once inhabited.  That means that I have to see my doctors regularly for them to look for this nasty beast in my lungs, kidney (it's sister is sadly gone) and liver. It started out being once every three months, but I've been promoted to once every 6 months! So, two weeks ahead of an appointment I have to visit a radiologist and a phlebotomist to have x-rays (or CT Scans or an MRI) done and blood drawn. All that to say, today was the radiology/blood day! This appointment required x-rays, so no problem there, they go quickly and are focused on my lungs. But the Phlebotomist! Oh, MY!! If they don't listen to me, we have problems. I can turn into a pin-cushion real quickly. The one today, did not listen. I would have given her an 'F' grade had she not redeemed herself in the end by saying, "I should have listened to you, the client!" Because of that, I gave her a 'C'.  Lets just say I'm not an easy draw and I'll sport the bruise from the draw I asked her not to do for more than a week. And where did she finally get the blood she needed? From right where I told her she'd get it! When you know; you know.

I went into the office early today so that I could get through all the appointments this afternoon without any problem. Thanks to my boss for being so flexible with me. It helped in other ways, since traffic has been really bad lately. Going in earlier was very helpful. I considered officially changing my schedule, but honestly, as long as I get my work done and keep my boss in the know, she doesn't care what hours I do! I love that and so much more about my work.

Progress continues to be made getting ready for school and we're all very excited about 'virtual high school'. That gets underway in less than 2 weeks. So the bottom-line is that we are all doing normal things around here. I'm sure many people saw a doctor today for various reason, drove in traffic and are getting ready for school, I just choose to write about it here. It helps me...I don't know why it helps me, but it does. I love to write and it keeps me away from food and eating.

Thanks for humoring my need to share. I'll spare you a list and haven't shot any video today, so you're free to go, now. Except...until tomorrow, sweet dreams, Sweeties! ;)

Day 30

Virtually a month has passed since I started this new journey to FINALLY be right; normal...HEALTHY! I've wasted more than half a century fiddling around with something that is really so simple, that I'm just totally ashamed. This isn't nuclear science! It's eating correctly (clearly, something I wouldn't have recognized if it had bit me on my nose) and getting proper exercise. I've been studying healthy, fit people and there are some things that are very common about these folks. So, yes I've made a list (I'm so happy!) of the top 10 things that I've noticed, so far.

Top 10 Things Fit People Have In Common

1. Fit people are not afraid of, nor do they dislike sweat and they do it regularly. I had to make friends with sweat. I hated it and now that I understand what it does, how it works and how GREAT I feel after sweating, I am doing it more and more regularly.
2. Fit people care about what they put in their mouths. Okay, maybe unfit people do too, but most of the unfit people I know (pretty much my whole family) will eat whatever as long as it was prepared properly and doesn't eat them first!
3. Fit people have a proper understanding of what food is and is not. I, on the other hand, had a weird relationship with food (the subject of which will be featured in a future blog. 'smile')
4. Fit people don't care how far away from the door they have to park their car. Yes, I was one of those people who would drive around trying to park close to the door. Why? Because I'm stupid and lazy.  Was!  Sorry...was stupid and lazy.  I'm reformed!
5. Fit people play sports! I've always wanted to have a sport to play, study and talk about. Most people wouldn't know it, but I always wanted to learn to play golf. My dad taught the boys, but he wouldn't teach me. Chauvinist! My dad was that and so much more. Sorry dad, but the truth is the truth! (Don't worry! He's dead and has forgotten all about it.)
6. Fit people keep physically busy. I've noticed that most of the fit people around me are always doing something active. Cleaning, yard work, volunteering and etc. People like the former 'Me' spend a lot of time saying things like, "I can clean the house later...I'm just too tired!"
7. Fit people don't catch as many 'bug' illnesses. The fit people I know at work (yes, there are a few there) don't call out sick much. Neither did I, but I also worked when I was sick, because even though I don't call out, I catch lots of stuff! I'm hoping that will be better now.
8. Fit people are more favorably thought of in social settings than their unfit friends. I know this because, one, I have eyes and can see and two, because I was unfit (okay, still am but changing my ways) and can clearly see the difference between how people treat me vs. my fit friends.
9. Fit people have LOTS more options for fun and adorable clothing. Man! I can't WAIT to be able to wear cuter clothes!!
10. Fit people don't scare the neighbors when they go outside in their bikini top and shorts! It will be over 100 degrees presently, so yes, I'll be scaring the neighbors some today. 'smile'

I wrote earlier in the week (Day 27) about some of the things I want out of life. The above, I suppose, could be just more of that. I want what fit people have. This work I'm doing to renovate me is going to get me what I want.

In the meantime, I need to be busy. As I've noted, fit people are busy people! So, besides doing more 'active' things like keeping my house and car cleaner, I will be writing more in the blog. I will start a bi-weekly blog posting where I'll write about the book(s) I read over the previous 2 weeks. I think I'll call the posts: Tome Time [Date]. This will help the readers know that the posting is about what I've been reading for the two weeks ahead of the date listed. I LOVE to read, but it is amazing how the unimportant, urgent (usually urgent for someone else) things of life can squeeze the things you love right out of your day! This will keep me focused and making time for reading knowing I need to write about that. There are other blog subjects that I want to start writing about and I'll be developing these ideas as I move along. I hope you'll enjoy them all! By the way, if you don't see a blog about what I've been reading in exactly two weeks from now (Sunday, August 25) please kick me in my a**! :)

I've been playing with some pictures today, comparing what I looked like just 30 days ago and I'm pleased with the results so far. I won't be taking any new pictures until next month, but until then here are some pictures from long ago that show me (more fit and more fat) than I am today and provide a glimpse into what I think fit vs. fat looks like.  Enjoy!

FAT

Okay, so above is me, FAT! And what did I care about? Eating mostly. Food I cooked and food I bought already made and you can see that that got me! Oh, and the MESS in the garage was there because I was "too tired" do clean it up! Shameful!!!!

FIT

And here we have my representation of fit, or at least more fit than fat. All of the 'women' in these two collages are me. In the fit representation above it was 2008 and I had worked off 107 lbs. of nasty FAT, only to allow illness and other stresses put it back on. I want to avoid this in future...been there; done that!

In the collages above there are some random pictures of food which probably makes sense to you, but there are some rooms that probably don't make sense. Well, notice that the room depicted in the 'fat' collage is a MESS and the one in the 'fit' collection is beautifully uncluttered and clean.  Also, I can get my car in the garage because I had the energy to clean it out!

So, fit vs. fat. What does it mean to you? To me it is the difference between living the life of a defeated person and a person who has great experiences. I want to be the later of these two people.  Please, GOD! Help me be fit!!! Until tomorrow and another beautiful day in my world, sweet dreams, Sweeties!

Day 28

How long does it take UPS to deliver a box? If it is a 5' tall, 37 lb. box containing a Rubbermaid Closet Organization system, it takes FORVER! Apparently my box that was put on a delivery truck at 6:29am Tuesday morning, is lost. Amazon has kindly sent a replacement, but I had to push for it. They wanted me to wait another week to see if UPStupid finds the box. You must be joking? Find it! They don't even want to talk to me about it. I started trying to think of how in the world they could have LOST this package and I suppose there are lots of places for a breakdown, but honestly! I wonder how much merchandise is lost (read 'stollen') just through shipping? I'm terribly afraid I would choke on the number. Thankfully, this is the first time this has happened to me, but I feel sorry for Amazon.com. They are out of pocket for two systems. I hope they can get some money back from UPStupid. (If you can't tell, I don't like UPS. Please use FedEx or USPS if you ever want your package to arrive.) So, that's been my afternoon; talking to UPStupid and Amazon.com about a missing shipment. Just what I wanted to do on my afternoon off. Well, not really, but I'm all about finding the happy in everything.

For the last couple of days I've been stuck in some terrible traffic and around some pretty bad drivers. I'm probably going to change my schedule again so that I can avoid these people. I really liked the 7-4 schedule, but sometimes I find it hard to get out of the office by 4. I'll just have to do better!

As day 28 is winding down, I can say that I'm happier than ever with MFF. I do want to stress that I'm still trying to figure out the best combination of foods for different days and am doing better at figuring it out. With snacks, added fruit and the meals, I figure I'm eating between 1,200 and 1,500 calories per day. Some days it is actually less than 1,200 calories! Before I started this I did a little calculating and found that to be gaining weight at my then weight of 270 lbs. and at the rate I was gaining, I had to have been consuming more than 4,000 calories per day. It was easy to see that most days were more like 5,000 calories. So, when I say I can eat VOLUMES of food, please understand that I know what I'm talking about.

One of the things I'll be doing this weekend, is going through my local grocery store (HEB) and looking for all of the food that is pre-packaged in a single portions and determining if it is something I can use in future. For example, I really love salsa and chips. You can buy salsa by the jar and a bag of chips, but then we run into the Nancy problem: Portion Size. (My what big portions you have!) So, I learned that a company called Sabra produces a single serve salsa and chips with total calories of 120! If I can't get that I'm going to look for just single serve chips that are okay for me to eat and get some salsa and create my own single portion setups that I can keep in the fridge. A snack of 120 calories of chips and salsa would be real satisfying sometimes. I know there are other options out there that I've just been missing. I love the MFF, but I also want to be able to function nicely when MFF isn't available. That means I need to be a bit more savvy. So, I'll be working on that this weekend. Don't get me wrong, I'll also be stocking up on MFF to cover Saturday-Tuesday!

Funny to think that we Americans have always had to be reminded to keep fit. The poster above is from WWII and even with all that was going on back then, I'm sure there were people just like me who got out of control. I really do think I have a duty to get and stay fit for my family, friends, coworkers and others around me. It's real easy to think of obesity as just MY problem, but it isn't. It affects all of the people around me. Just like their smoking, drinking and other bad behaviors affect me. Now, I'm not saying that everyone should look at this like I do, it just helps me to think of the people around me. That's just how I'm wired. Honestly though, can you guys quit smoking and drinking, please? Remember, I asked nicely!

Today is walk on the treadmill day! I have a new mild brace for my left knee (the one I shattered 15 years ago) and I'm hoping that will help reduce pain in the left leg. My left hip is not as sore today as it has been over the last week, so I don't want it to wake up and start hurting again. As I walk I'll think of all you out there working along with me to get and stay FIT! Until day 29, sweet dreams, Sweeties!

Update:  Walked 31minutes and 48 seconds tonight on the treadmill!  Happy, happy, happy...

Days 25 and 26

What is it with me lately that I skip a day of writing about what's going on around here! Yesterday I think it was...well...who knows what kept me occupied. Things are just always hoppin' here lately. The sad truth is that I am a hyper person who is easily distracted. So, my son, who is easily distracted, comes by his affliction honestly.

Before I get into anything else, just let me say this, My Fit Foods, just DO IT! This is the only way to eat. I LOVE IT! Food is finally what it's supposed to be. I'd write a list about what food has been to me, but I'll spare you that until later. I'm still identifying all the things I made food into besides what it is, nourishment.

I'm getting better at making the exercise regular. My goal is Monday/Wednesday/Friday 30 minutes of walking on the treadmill at 3 miles per hour. Well, goal one is that. I'm not there yet. For the moment I'm doing 20 minutes, but I'm getting there. This hip thing I'm dealing with is nasty and making me MAD, but it will be resolved. The weight is coming off! I can tell in my clothes and every day it is better.

This trip to healthy land is the last time I'm going to make the journey. That's because when I get there, I'm movin' in! In my faith we call our bodies temples. However, my temple was on the verge of being condemned! I want my temple to be a mansion!! All decorated with the healthiest skin, organs, hair, nails, teeth, joints...you name it!! My mansion/temple is going to be the envy of the other temple owners. Okay, so that's probably an exaggeration, but I have high aspirations!!

Yesterday and today were the two days back in the office after a couple of days off. You can only imagine what that was like. CRAZY!! I love taking off, but WOW the first couple of days back can be MURDER! Yet, here I am.  I successfully vanquished the email, solved problems and made nice as best I could. That's what I do, solve problems and make nice.

Now, the problem is to get myself to bed. I've determined that I need 9 hours of sleep each day to feel great and so, I'm going to go get those hours! Until the next blog, sweet dreams, Sweeties!

Day 9

Welcome to Sunday, or depending on when you're reading, farewell Sunday. I love Sunday! Sunday is 'family' day. For me, everyday is family day, but that's because I love my family! So, first let me say that I'm being quite unconventional today, but I'm having a good time, so no matter. I'll take you through the food first so that you can FINALLY see a My Fit Food meal, since I FINALLY took pictures.

Breakfast was the unconventional part. I ate at about 9am, which by the way, seems like a good time for me to eat breakfast. I decided to have the My Fit Foods Blazin' Cajun Shrimp! This was FANTASTIC!  It is getting the Nancy food rating of:

Remember, 4 faces means 'I could eat this every day!' The plate was beautiful (sorry, I was so hungry I forgot to take a picture, RATS!!). There was a skewer of medium shrimp on top of flavorful turkey dirty rice with two nice asparagus and two lemon wedges. So colorful and eye appealing. Tack on to that the fact that it tasted GREAT; really spicy; it's a WINNER!!

For lunch, I finally took pictures. I decided since today is my cheat meal for supper, I would keep it light at lunch and stay on the 'fish' theme. The meal I chose is the Salmon Roasted Vegetable Dinner. I would rate this one:

Here are some pictures:

The reason I give this 2 Nancy Faces, is because it was okay, but not great. Taste was good and it was very filling, but not exciting. I think the shrimp is the seafood winner so far.

This was also 'cheat meal' day and that means I had a burger for supper tonight:

Can you tell that my burger and fries (yes, I ate all but one little piece of the fries) were from Whataburger? Uh huh, it was tasty, but I'm so stuffed, I don't think I want to do the cheat meal every single week. Frankly, I'm enjoying the My Fit Foods so much I don't see a reason to really cheat. I talked with my husband about splitting a burger and he's all for doing that, but honestly, I think I'll leave the burgers to the boys and only have a cheat meal when I really want one. I reserve the right to have a 'cheat meal' any Sunday, but I really don't want one every Sunday.

So, I'm DYING to write a list, so here is my list for the day:

Top 10 Reasons to Use My Fit Foods to Feed Myself

1. They have a great selection.
2. The meals are really tasty!
3. They are portion controlled.  (This is a BIG deal as I can eat VOLUMES of food!)
4. I can choose between small, medium or large portions, which gives me some flexibility.
5. These meals are made out of REAL FOOD!!!!
6. Each meal is a healthy combination of protein, carbohydrates and fats.
7. They seem to be low in sodium.
8. There is a HUGE selection of meals to choose from!
9. My Fit Foods is easily accessible in my area at several locations, including grocery store kiosks.
10. I DIDN'T HAVE TO PREP IT, PLAN IT, OR COOK IT!!!!!!!

I have lost more than 100 lbs. in my life, 2 other times. The first time I was on Opti-fast, which was very bad for me and caused all kinds of problems. I won't go into that story, but it was BAD...really BAD. The second time, I counted calories, but I never really got over the portions issue and when push came to shove, life got hard or I was pinched for what to eat I just ate whatever. Yes, because I'm lame. With My Fit Foods, I can have things that are really tasty and healthy in the fridge ready to go and if I'm out, guess what? They are right around the corner and I can pick-up what I want, just like at a fast-food place! NO EXCUSES NOW! So, I may have to eat My Fit Foods for the rest of my life, and you know what else? Yea!! They can cook for me forever if it keeps me healthy and fit. I may have to walk into the store, open my purse and say, "Take whatever you want, as long as I get to leave with all my meals prepared for me!" It may sound crazy, but this is me we're talking about and I think I deserve the best for myself. I think this is the best option for me. Yes, I may still prepare something now and then for myself, but you know what, I don't really think I will. Cooking as always been something I was good at, but it's really bad for me to do it, because I have NO WILLPOWER when it comes to good food. I want to eat...love to chew...love to taste...Yes, I'm LAME! Stupid!! Whatever you want to call me, I'm probably that, but I'm also, GREAT!!!!!!!

That's the extent of damage that I did to Sunday. Besides getting ready for the work week, I think I'll give myself a little spa night from 8-10pm! Until tomorrow, sleep well, Sweeties!!

Day 8

Hello, Sweeties!! A new day and a new week for me to tear up!!! I was a slow riser this morning and so had to grocery shop with all the other late Saturday risers. What a mad house! But I did do something I've been wanting to do for over a week now. I bought meals from My Fit Foods, to cover my next three days, instead of the items I put on the list last night. I'll include information about how these worked as I blog along over the next few days.

I at my first My Fit Food meal for lunch after the grocery store. Unfortunately, I was so hungry (not having had any breakfast this morning) that I failed to take a picture of it. That's okay, because My Fit Foods can be found at myfitfoods.com and you can see a picture of what I had there! So, my very first meal was the Texas Fit BBQ. I must say that it was delicious! With My Fit Foods, you can choose small, medium or large portions. I selected the small, because I wanted to see if the small one would fill me up. Take into consideration that I was really hungry, having had no breakfast when I ate the meal for my lunch today, at the end of the meal, I was satisfied and I would go even further and say, full. So, I'm preparing a rating scale for the My Fit Foods.  I'll be using my little drawing of myself as the scale. Here is the key to the rating system:  1 icon=okay; 2=average; 3=great!; 4=I want this every day!! Here is the icon:

So, the Texas Fit BBQ (small portion) I had today for lunch would rate as:  

Next time, I'll have a picture of the meal for you!

Last week I promised benchmarking pictures of me. This has got to be one of the hardest things I'll do in the blog; provide pictures of myself. As time goes by, it should get easier, but for now, please know that I didn't like taking or looking at these images. If nothing else, they do help me stay on track, because it is SO BAD right now. Here is my benchmark (I'm weighing in at about 280 lbs. here):

Yep, this is me. The plan is to get me to what I call, "I can think weight," which is about 100 lbs. less. Once I'm at 180 lbs. I will start the next phase, which is the fight, and I do mean FIGHT, to get another 30 lbs off me. at 150 lbs. (and by that time 55 years old) I'll be satisfied...I think...but maybe not. I know how I want to feel and look and I won't really be happy until I'm there.  Whenever that is and however long it takes to get there, I don't want to forget what it felt like and looked like being here. I'm so ashamed of myself! However did I let this happen? Thinking! That's my problem.  I think stupid things (see my "Out of Control" blog posting from July 12, 2013) all the time! To put it simply, I make s**t up, all the time, that simply is NOT true! Yet, I lamely go along believing it. What a mess I can be! But thankfully, I'm wise to my stupid thinking and I'm going to do things this time to stop that madness. 

I'm ready for a bit of rest and fun now. I'll take a walk today and see if I can help the sciatica thing go away. I do believe that losing weight has got to help. Thanks for checking in on me. Have a lovely Saturday, Sweeties!!

Day 7

Day 7, which means I've been focused on this properly for one week. That's 1/52 of the time where I will blog daily about the experience. A fraction of time, but so much work to do. Today was an odd eating day. I can't say I was actually hungry, but I ate what I wanted. Here is what I ate:

Breakfast - Leftover vegetable/beef hash and two pieces of toast

Snack - Half of a 130 calorie package of Pistachio Nuts

Lunch - Egg Salad Sandwich w/10 chips and a caffein-free Diet Coke

Snack - Handfull of Cheese Nips

Dinner - 2 pieces of pork BBQ Jerky and a 160 calorie cheese sandwich

The only reason I know the calorie count of the nuts is because I looked at the package and the Cheese Sandwich is something I eat a lot of, so I know the calorie count by heart.

One thing I have realized is that I have got to get the sugar out from everywhere I find it. The granola bars are gone. I've given them away to people at work who looked hungry. I'll use Stevia to sweeten tea and such, but no other sweetener, if I can avoid it. I think it's better for me that way. Fruit tastes miles sweeter with the sugar out of my system. Also, I can tell I'm not as hungry as it has been.

I've been working on my grocery list for the week. A few things that I will be purchasing regularly are:

Zucchini Squash

Yellow Squash

Spaghetti Squash

Broccoli

Cauliflower

Red Peppers

Grape Tomatoes

I have a thing for squash at the moment. I also am enjoying a combination of vegetables and lean meat, chicken or fish cooked together like a 'hash'. It probably doesn't sound appetizing, but really it's great! Easy to prepare and tastes delicious. My latest combination was onions, celery and cauliflower, cooked with extra lean ground been. Then add a small amount of of low-fat cheese to melt and hold things together and add a little zip to the taste. I sprinkled it with a garlic herb mix and a little salt and pepper. Delicious. I'm a big fan of one-pot meals. I make a mean skillet pasta dish, but pasta is not a favorite of mine. If I'm having spaghetti, it will probably be squash!

I'm looking forward to the weekend and yes, I'll have my cheat meal on Sunday evening. Until Day 8, sleep well, my Sweeties!!

Day 4

Life marches on! Day 4 has come and gone. I better stop quick or this is going to turn into the rhyming blog from he**!! This was a really good day. I had energy and made a few new realizations about my work to create a healthy lifestyle. Since there are a 'few' realizations, that means a LIST! Yep!! Here we go:

Top 10 Things I Discovered on Day 4

10.  Cake is still out there! (See, I thought for sure it was gone forever!!)

  9.  I can change one thing at a time and that won't break anyone's rules.  (I can be ME! Who knew!?!)

  8.  Eating healthy is not hard, just different. (I keep trying to make it hard!)

  7.  Getting more exercise starts with one step. (Again, I try to make things that are simple, hard.)

  6.  Healthy lifestyle people think about other things than food. (Wow! I want to do that!!)

  5.  Thin people do not think about food when they are full. (There is other stuff to think about?)

  4.  Thin people could care less about food. (This is just mind boggling to me!)

  3.  Thin people may not be healthy. (It's not about thin, but it is...does that make sense? Comments?)

  2.  I do not want to be defined by my body image. (Fat or thin...does it have to define me?)

  1.  I'm in charge of me and I get to decide...everything! (POWER!!)

Now that I've enjoyed the heaven that is writing a list, I'm ready to share more about the day's successes and failures. I ate pretty much according to plan. I skipped the afternoon snack successfully by being super busy. I really don't think the granola bars are a good choice for me. They are nice tasting, but really make me want more sweets. I had my planned breakfast this morning:

Scrambled Egg w/1 sausage cut in half and cheese on toast.  Yummy!!

That was nice. No break room Avante Market for me today! Yea!! A victory!!! Lunch was exactly as I had planned with the tacos, just like yesterday. Dinner was the leftover spaghetti squash, this time with rotisserie chicken I had in the freezer, combined with leftover pasta sauce:

All in all, a great day. I think I'll know I'm getting better about food when I stop feeling like I have to take a picture of every plate of food I eat. Somehow at the moment I think I have to do that. I'll just call it working on my camera technique...it could use some work! :)

During my lunch break today, I worked on an idea for a way for me to sort of know how well I'm doing and set personal goals for myself. I decided that the scale is out until the very end. I have weighed myself at the beginning, but I won't be sharing what the weight loss amount is until I feel like I'm in the maintenance phase of my journey. At that point I'll do a blog dedicated to just the numbers and such. Anyway, I decided that I would set my goals and judge my performance by clothes that I already own that I cannot currently wear. For instance. I have a little black dress that is size 22/24. I cannot really fit into this dress properly. It is my first goal clothing item. I will set 6 goal points (one every other month) and then work to be able to wear the goal item by the goal date. Each goal clothing item will be successively smaller in size. I think I have what I need to get me at least down to a size XL. Currently I'm a 26/28. I'm writing a blog dedicated to just this idea and hope to have it up within the next few days. I'll include in the blog how it will work and what will happen as I reach success. Part of what is important to me this time around is to actually make the process FUN! I hope you'll enjoy that blog when it comes out.

Anyway, that's what's what over here in what used to be 'Out-of-Control-Crazy-Land!' I'm feeling more in-control every day. I can't wait to see what tomorrow teaches me! until then, sleep well and have a lovely life, Sweeties!!

Day 2

Hello! As I start this posting it is a bright, shining Sunday and I've been up since 7:30am. That is sleeping late for me! Usually my day starts at either 4 or 6am. It really depends on when my meetings start on any given business day, whether I'm traveling or not and what is on my plate for the day. Today, I have laundry and fun on my plate so sleeping late is okie-dokie! I'll write on this blog throughout the day and post it after I've eaten dinner tonight. So, in a way, this will be a kind of 'day-in-the-life' blog post.

I had the oatmeal breakfast I've planned for the upcoming week and to be honest, I think I have to change the plan. Although I love oatmeal, I think I need to have food in the morning that isn't sweet and I like my oatmeal a bit sweet.  Also, I was disappointed at the lettuce at the HEB yesterday, so I have no salad for my supper for the next few days. So, I'm modifying the plan for Monday-Wednesday to the following (I added calories and about what time I'm going to eat these, but don't get used to it!):

• Breakfast @7am - A scrambled egg sandwich topped with low-fat cheese, a little mayo and one link sausage (This is about 350 calories).
• Snack @10am - 1, 6 oz. Fage Fat-Free Greek Yogurt (140 calories)
• Lunch @1pm - Two bean and cheese tacos w/some kind of salad or vegetable and a piece of fruit (420 calories).
• Snack @4pm - 1 granola bar pack (180 calories)
• Dinner @7pm - Spaghetti squash topped with shrimp and sauce; a piece of fruit (242 calories)
• Snack @I-Don't-Know pm - Smoothy (240 calories)
• Total calories=1572 (w/out the smoothy=1332!  Not bad!!)

Last night (day 1) I didn't need the smoothy, so I'm hoping that continues. The fact that the smoothy has to be made might deter me a bit, since I can get where I run out of time in the evenings. When I have stuff that has to be done and need to get to bed, I don't even think about food! Weird, but true!! I like the yogurt and granola bar snacks, mainly because they are easy and again, portion controlled. The tacos were easy to pre-prep and the 6 tacos that I'll need for my lunch Monday-Wednesday are already prepared and in the frig! The salad will be an issue.  I don't see a problem with the spaghetti squash as that cooks in the microwave really quickly and the sauce is jared and the shrimp are prepped and in the freezer.  I will add 8 shrimp to each meal.

Today is my free meal day, but I'm sticking to plan except for dinner. I want my free meal to be dinner tonight. I haven't decided what I want, but I know that I don't want to prepare the meal myself; I want something different...I think...I don't know yet. As the blog moves along I'll figure it out.

I got a snapshot of my snack that I'm eating while I'm writing this. Although it is almost noon, I'm having my snack instead of lunch. I'm not sure I'll need a full 'lunch' today since I really do want something special for dinner...just don't know what...hmmm..... While I'm thinking about that, here is my morning snack:

One thing that I've been thinking about is using a food service for my meals for awhile. There is a local company called My Fit Foods (myfitfoods.com) that I'm considering using for a few days to see first, if I like the foods and secondly if the cost fits into my budget.  It isn't cheap, but if you check out their website you'll see that everyone who eats just My Fit Foods, loses weight and has more energy.  Well, that's what I want, so maybe it is what I should do.  I don't know yet. I'm still researching. Since there are My Fit Foods kiosks in my local grocery stores, I may just go in and buy foods for one day to check it out and see what I think. I'll blog about it when I do it. It will definitely be after Wednesday of this week!

Okay, so much for the 'I might not eat lunch today' idea! My husband made me a picnic of one of my favorite foods (to get it out of the house), which is HOT DOGS!!  Yummy!!  Here is my little picnic eaten on the front porch, true picnic style!!  The Real Ale Hans' Pils beer is his!!

These are my favorite Nathan's Hot Dogs on HEB buns with HEB 2% Sharp Cheddar, Whataburger Mustard (our grocery store now carries this mustard and it's GREAT) and Best Maid Pickle Relish. I added a small serving of Tostitos and some black tea in my official Starbucks tumbler.  It was DELICIOUS!! Yes, okay, this should be my cheat meal, but it isn't. This is a 'get it out of the house' meal. There may be some more of this in my future. I don't think the boys are going to get any more hot dogs as I don't think I can buy them and not eat them. Hot Dogs may become my official cheat meal, but only time will tell. We're only on Day 2, you know!!

I've decided that my official cheat meal this week is a P. Terry's Hamburger Stand, Burger and Fries! I ordered the Chicken Burger and fries.  Here is what it looked like:

We again ate the meal picnic style, as a nice cool front came through and made it a real nice evening for eating alfresco.  I don't know the calorie count, but the chicken burger has to be less calories than the double burger the boys had!  Fries aren't my favorite kind of potato, but I had some anyway. Great cheat meal for the week. I can honestly say that I'm ready for what the next week will bring. For now, I'm off to fold laundry, give myself a pedicure, clean my make-up brushes and get ready for bed. When next you hear from me it will be Day 3 and I'm ready for it to give me all its got! See you later, Sweeties!

Day 1 of 365, to a Better ME!

Today is day 1 of 365, where I focus on exchanging my life for a more healthy variety; one that I truly desire. There are 5 areas where I want to improve: eating, exercise, thinking, skin and teeth. As you have read, I have allowed myself to go back to old habits and if I do not change them, they will deprive me of my life. Yes, I've done this before and was stupid enough to go back to old ways of eating and not exercising. I know that this time I have to change my thinking in order to make the improvements stick, for good. At the same time, I want to improve health and appearance of my skin and teeth. So, here goes!

One of the things I know will help me stay away from extra food is to blog daily. There could be reasons why a blog isn't published on a day, but with good planning it will be fine. Writing will occupy me sufficiently and give my hands something to do. Also, I've learned that I cannot watch 'food' videos. I used to watch cooking shows on PBS and loved watching videos on YouTube, but these just make me hungry and crave whatever is being cooked in the video. Put on top of that the fact that I really love food and like to cook and it's like personal sabotage to continue watching this programing. So they go!

I promise to share pictures of what I'm eating, what exercise I'm doing or whatever will help me share what I'm doing to improve. Here is what I had for dinner tonight:

I love shrimp and it is an excellent source of protein for a person who wants to lose weight. 

It was hard to do this the last time around and I'm scared that it will be even harder this time. It's better for me to admit that I'm scared. That way I can face my task head on, without being encumbered by my own stupid thinking. Remember, I have to change my thinking!

The next step is to start exercising. This will be walking in the beginning. I have a treadmill, which will help since the temperature here is over 100 degrees daily this time of the year. The only problem at the moment is my hip/lower back. When my sister visited me last week, I made a little mistake and thought I was suddenly 16 again.  The two of us were dancing around the bedroom to a really great song and somehow I did something to what is probably my sciatic nerve.  Now I have excruciating pain in my left hip that radiates down my leg into my calf.  In the prone position I'm fine. Sitting down, I'm pretty good, but when I try to stand up...YEOWWWWW!!  It's very painful.  For now, I'm doing stretches.  I know that actually cardio will help me more than anything, but I won't try that until after the weekend.  If I had kept up with my exercise and not put the weight back on I probably wouldn't have injured myself wiggling around the bedroom!  See!  STUPID!!!

Okay, so for day one it wasn't bad.  My breakfast/snack was all in one and was a piece of Banana Walnut Bread from Starbucks and some Black Tea (okay, not great, but not too horrible either...at least it was portion controlled!).  Lunch was two, bean and low-fat cheese tacos with cucumber, tomato and onion salad.  A snack at about 4pm was an orange and dinner was as you see above:  Mushrooms, Asparagus and Shrimp.  Oh, wait a minute!  My husband brought me an ice cream cone at about 1pm.  I almost forgot eating that!  See!!  I didn't even think about it.  I took it and ate it...like I was on auto-pilot or something.  STUPID!!!  For a first day, not bad and tomorrow will be better.  The food is my greatest challenge so don't be surprised when I'm focused on it.  Next, exercise!  I know I'll have a good plan worked out in no time.  Thanks for stopping by and checking in on me. I can't wait for day 2 with the hopes that I'll be less and less STUPID as time goes by!!  Good night, Sweeties!!

Out of Control

Apparently I am living in "Out-of-Control-Crazy" Land.  Congratulate me, because I've successfully eaten my way to almost all the weight I lost back on my stupid body.  I don't know what I've been thinking!  Oh, wait a minute!!  Yes, I do...I am, after all, ME!  I know EXACTLY what I've been thinking and it wasn't, "You don't want that cake!"  Here are the top 10 things that I've been thinking (mentally saying to myself) that have launched me out of control (Oh boy!  A LIST!!):

10.  "You can eat sensibly tomorrow!" (Tomorrow never comes!)
  9.  "You're too tired to eat sensibly."  (Really?  Exactly how are these related, Nancy???)
  8.  "There is too much to do to waste time eating sensibly." (Lame!)
  7.  "There just aren't any quick, sensible eating options available."  (Lame squared!!)
  6.  "You can live a perfectly happy life being morbidly obese."  (Who the HECK am I kidding?)
  5.  "Everyone else is eating Cheesecake!" (Next, I'll be jumping off a cliff with everyone!)
  4.  "I work hard and can have whatever I want...damit!" (Good try!!  NOT)
  3.  "I'll die if I don't have cake right NOW!"  (Prove it!!)
  2.  "I HAVE to eat this cake because it's the last cake that will ever be available!!!"  (Just so you  know, this one applies to Corvettes, diamond jewelry and trips to Hawaii...don't you know!)
  1.  "No one will ever know that I'm out of control." (Honestly, we all KNOW, Nancy!!)

So, now I have to DIG my way out of this mess, yet again and it's not going to be so easy this time. Not that it was all that easy the first time, but I was younger. Yes, I could waste more time coming up with all the excuses for why I left the path of righteousness, but lets just say I'm stupid and leave it at that. As they say, there is no time like the present, so it starts again for me, now.

Last time around I counted every calorie. I'm not in a big hurry and I couldn't do that forever, so I'm not even going to try that this time. This time I'll use what I've learned about portion control and take an lesson from others who say to pre-plan the food so that it becomes a non-issue.  I'm also going to allow myself one meal per week, where I can have what I want and strive to make what I'm normally eating, really what I want.

There are thousands of tips and tricks available online and I'll use the "cherry" method to weed through these.  What's the "cherry" method?  Eat the fruit and spit out the pits.  In other words, I'll try things and what works stays and what doesn't goes, fast!  I've decided to eat three meals and three snacks per day and will space them out as evenly as possible.  My goal is to be able to reduce the snacks to just one, but we'll start with this. For me, I also know that it will be easier for me to buy the food once a week and pre-prep the meals for three days at a time. So, Sunday night I'll prep for Monday-Wednesday and Wednesday night I'll prep for Thursday-Saturday.  Sunday will be my day for a meal of whatever I want. Again, I'm going to be trying to always have things I want, so that I don't feel deprived. I just may have to rethink some of those things. I'm planning to eat the same thing every day for this week because it will just be easier for me to do that as I get started again.  Here is the menu for the week:

Meal Plan - Week 1

Breakfast - Oatmeal with Raisins and Walnuts and Tea
Snack #1 - Plain, non-fat Yogurt w/Frozen Blueberries
Lunch - Bean tacos with lettuce, tomatoes and cheese, a piece of whole fruit and Tea
Snack #2 - A (sensible calorie count) Granola or Protein bar
Dinner - Caesar Salad w/ Shrimp, Croutons and a light dressing, a piece of fruit and Tea
Snack #3 - A smoothy made with milk, protein powder, unsweetened frozen fruit and Stevia

The breakfast will be an easy 2.5 minutes in the microwave.  I'll prepackage the frozen blueberries for the yogurt snack and buy pre-portioned yogurt. I'll pre-role the tacos and portion the salad topping for the lunches and prep the salad for the dinners so that I just have to sauté the shrimp and add the toppings.

I don't have any idea of the calorie counts for the above.  I know what the portion sizes should be and I'll use my trusty measuring cups to help me get everything right. I'll be sure to give an update on Wednesday on how the prep worked and how all of the meals went for me. Groceries will be tomorrow, so I'll share what I ended up with (product wise) to cover the meals. On a side note, I'll also share what it cost to buy the supplies for this meal plan for 1 person for 6 days. Although I'm not trying to save money, it is always nice to know what things cost.

I know I've been here before, but the fact is I'm here again and this is a very bad place for me to be in. I can get out, but I'm the only one who can do it for me. So, here goes! Wish me luck!! Bye-bye for now, sweeties!